So the guy I'm sort of dating, Zach, asked me out to my favorite bar, an Irish pub called The Fastnet. I love the Fastnet, not only because it is close to my apartment, but because it is a cozy pub run by Irish immigrants. It feels very authentic when you're sipping a Guinness and the bartender has an actual Irish brogue.But the date with Zach had a twist: he wanted me to meet his close friends. To me, this seemed like a big step. See, dating Zach is still in what I like to call 'the area of ambiguity', meaning I have no idea what is going on. I don't know if we're dating just for the sake of dating, or working our way to a relationship. Meeting his close friends may indicate that he is looking towards getting serious. Who knows.
I was a little nervous to meet his friends, but I figured it would be at my favorite bar, and Guinness would be available, so I should be able to handle any situation. We got to The Fastnet at around nine-thirty, and Zach's friends, Pete and Natalie, showed up at ten. To my relief they were nice, normal people, and seemed excited to meet me. We took a table and watched the Yankees-Red Sox game. The Sox won, which was pretty sweet. Nothing better then seeing them kick the pants off the Yankees.
I noticed Pete and Natalie were drinking Coronas, which in my opinion, is a blasphemous activity in an Irish pub like the Fastnet. I pointed this out to them as delicately as possible:
"What are you guys doing drinking Coronas in the Fastnet? C'mon, now."
I held up my pint of Guinness as an example of proper drinking conduct.
"It's Cinco de Mayo!" Natalie replied, as if this excused their poor drinking choices.
I looked to Zach to back me up, but he was drinking a Bud Light. He doesn't like Guinness anyway (which I'm sure some would say is a sign that we will never work out).
I dropped the whole argument, but inwardly I was incredulous. No one celebrates Cinco De Mayo in Newport. I hadn't even realized it was Cinco de Mayo, and to be honest, I don't even know what the day commemorates.
Pete suggested we go play some darts, so we all got up and headed to the dart board. I told them I would meet them there and went to the bar first to get a glass of water.
"You're getting a water? Are you a lightweight?" someone asked me.
I turned and saw a short man looking at me, a smirk on his face. He had a high and tight haircut, a sure sign he was from the nearby naval base.
"I can get a water if I want," I replied, a little offended at his 'lightweight' comment.
"I bet you can't do a shot with me," he answered.
I rolled my eyes. What is with men and these pick-up lines? He has to insult my imbibing ability? I looked at the young man and thought to myself that I could drink him under the table; in my high heels I was taller than him.
"Buy me a shot and I'll do it," I replied finally. I had only one pint in my belly; a shot would pose no problem, especially if it would get this guy to shut up.
He bought two shots of gin (honestly, who does gin shots?), and I like a pro I tossed mine back, then clacked the glass down on the bar. I looked over at the guy, and he was literally sipping and wincing his way through the shot. Give me a break.
I turned to leave this lame specimen when I suddenly found myself surrounded by short men with high and tight haircuts. This must be Gin Shot's group of friends. I immediately sensed that they were sailors from the base.
Two things went through my mind: first, I was on a date, and it didn't look good it I were doing shots and hanging out with a bunch of sailors. Secondly, I am the daughter of an Admiral, and he would disapprove of my hanging out with a group of enlisted guys.
The short sailors all spoke at once.
"You from around here?"
"Drinking Randy under the table, huh?"
"You're pretty cute."
Ahhh, I have to get out of here. My back pressed against the bar, I looked over at the dart board and saw Zach looking at me, perplexed. I rose my eyebrows in a 'Help me!' gesture, but of course it went completely over his head. Gin Shot finally finished his shot-pitiful!- and asked me if I wanted another one. The situation was getting out of control, and I realized it was time to drop the one line that is guaranteed to scare off any military guy, especially an enlisted one:
"You guys are in the navy?" I asked sweetly. "So is my Dad! He's an Admiral."
One sailor physically recoiled, reeling away from the circle. I kid you not.
I plowed on, making sure they saw I was legit: "Yeah, he's second in command of MSC, working under Admiral Riley."
"Shit, Admiral Riley?" One sailor asked, and they started to back away from me. I am seriously not kidding- it was like I announced I had a bomb strapped to my chest.
"I guess I shouldn't be buying you shots, then," Gin Shot said, and he looked at me with fear in his eyes.
Natalie appeared at my elbow. I swear, girls have a sixth sense for when fellow chicks are embroiled in guy trouble.
"Annie, let's go play some darts," she said, taking me by the hand and leading me out of the circle of sailors.
"Thank you," I said, once we were out of earshot.
"You looked like you needed help," she answered. I liked her already.
Zach was confused and a little irritated when I finally appeared at the dart board.
"Making new friends?" he asked.
"Hey, I looked at you for help," I pointed out. "And that sailor was talking trash about my drinking ability. I had to set things straight."
"I saw you doing shots with him," Zach replied.
"I shot," I answered. "He sipped. No contest." Honestly, did he think I wanted to go through all that?
The rest of the night passed smoothly- Zach quickly got over the moment of jealously, and things returned to normal. Except...at one point in the night, while I was in the ladies room, the door to the bathroom stall jammed, and it took three girls pulling from the outside and me kicking from the inside to get out. Thankfully I emerged unscathed, and it was actually pretty cool kicking out a door in high heels. Another incident of girl teamwork for the night.
And yes, the 'Admiral's Daughter' line never fails...
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